God gifts moms with a built-in sense for the safety of their children. My wife has an eye for safety that is unparalleled…and I have no doubt that her insights have saved our children from utter disaster on many occasions. She truly has earned the title “Chief Risk Officer”!

But what happens when this sense of safety comes in conflict with a father’s desire to give children autonomy so they learn to navigate life on their own? After all, “if you aren’t making mistakes if you aren’t learning”. Am I right, Dads?

This conflict over safety is common in almost every marriage, so parents you’re not alone in your struggle. To resolve the conflict, consider 1 Peter 3:5-7:

5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands,

6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.
7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

God not only commands husbands to love their wives as Christ love the Church (and gave His life for it, Ephesians 5:25), but to live with their wives in a patient, understanding way. This means that husbands need to listen to their wives, genuinely hearing their concerns over their children’s safety.

At the same time, God commands wives to be subject to their husbands and do not fear.  “Do not fear” is an interesting phrase. What does Peter mean?

Peter is instructing wives to entrust their fears to God – even when their husbands determine that risk is warranted. Obedient wives, after the pattern of Sarah, know that God is sovereign over the safety of their children.

God can be trusted to work out all things for good to those that trust, obey (husbands by truly listening, and wives by submitting) and love Him.

Posted in Marital Conflict, Trusting God